Oh How I Miss You

Today is your birthday. Today was the day God created someone I felt so attuned to. Today was the day He set you free into the world. 

I don't know where we stand now. I don't know what we are. I don't even know what I want. But I do know one thing, I am glad you were born. I am glad I was given an opportunity to meet you. To get to know what a wonderful person you are. Sixteen years ago, on a tiny island called Penang, you were born. And I'm glad. 

I feel like I walking through water. Like I'm just having a bad nightmare. Because I actually texted you. But how I wish I was not such a wimp. How I wish I called rather than just send a measly text. How I wish I called and sang for you at the top of my lungs. I could go on forever about how I wish things were. But they aren't the way I want it, now are they? 

I know you're mad at me. I even have a rough idea why. But believe me, I still care. I know I'm a grouch, and all the things I'm doing to you are hurting you. But sweety, you'll always be my sister. Sister from a different mother, a different father and a different culture. But still my sister. Always. 

Remember my promise to you? That I want to get you a puppy? That we will go to SPCA together and get you a puppy since you're brother is away? I planned it all out in my head. But that's the past isn't it? But I won't stop praying. I will keep hoping. Maybe one day, the hope will die out. Fade away, blew away.. but for now, I'm still hoping. Still praying. 

I mean what I texted you. I hope you're happy. Now, and always. Forever. God bless you. And happy birthday. I love you. 

Oh How I Miss You. 

A 

Laughing with you is where I want to be right now.